I had a conversation with a girlfriend of mine that I have known for a few years. One thing that she often jokes about is how all of my exes or people that I have dated always try to come back. Even though I do not believe in going back, there are ways that I handle things that may be different from most women.
I have never been the type of women that is going to agree with a man just because he is a man. I have never been the type to be needy, clingy, or to beg for your attention.
I have come to the realization that if someone does not want me then they do not want me, it is not up to me to try to convince them of anything. If they do not see that on their own then oh well.
You would be amazed at how having this attitude will change the way people see you.
This may be a shocker to many of you women, but after a break up, begging, crying, and gaining 30 pounds is not the way to go. It will only prove to your ex that your are a crazy clingy psycho and he made the right choice by breaking up with you.
So here are just a few break up tips that you should always follow. Sometimes it may make your ex want to come back and even if it doesn't you still get to save face and not look crazy.
1. Do not beg for anyone to be with you.
If someone wants to break up with you, let them. You may be hurting and you may want to cry, but save all of that for after they walk out of the door. You would be shocked at how many people get off seeing someone beg and act a fool over them.
Do not be that fool. Do not cry and spit tears over someone not wanting to be with you, at least not in front of them. If they cannot see your value then they should not be in your life anyway.
2. Always look good.
True story, I had an ex call me because a mural friend saw me at the library, and told him that I looked great and he was considering asking me out.
My point is that story could have been different if I was looking like the hot mess express train ran over twice.
3. Get up and get out.
After a break up do not sit looking at the sky wondering when your next man is going to fall out of it. Date, go out with friends, do something. Get a hobby, pray, go to church, go back to school. I am famous for that after every break up I get a new degree or write a book. And these are the things that will get your mind off the break up and show your ex that your identity is not in them.
You always want an ex to say, “wow she is really doing good, why did I let her go.”
4. Stop with the emotional break downs.
I cannot tell you how pathetic is it to see a man trying to break up with a woman and she will cry and cry her way out of the break up. Yeah he may take the break up back for that moment because he does not want to see the water works. But it still does not change the fact that he wants to break up. You are just delaying the inevitable.
Men will be with you even if they do not want to be with you, if they know that it will cause you to have a break with reality.Therefore, I ask you, why would want anyone to be with you under these circumstances.
So just to be clear. If a man wants to break up with you. Do not cry or make any trips to the psychiatric ward because someone wants to leave you.
5. Do not chase.
When an ex leaves you, do not stop by his mother home to have a conversation about what her son did and try to convince her why your should get back with you.
Do not move into the apartment next to his or start working part-time at his favorite hangout spot. Do not call all of his friends, sister, and everyone else that he knows to try to get them to tell your ex what a great catch you are.
Women some how think this is cute, but it is creepy.
This may come as a shock to you, but the secret to not letting a break up break you is to just be you. The you before you met him.
0 comments:
Post a Comment